I Can’t see the Kids Going Without – Case 117

This is case study number 117

This is Zane’s Story:

Zane – Tell us about what is going on with your situation?

We’ve been separated for about half a dozen years and have two kids in a 50 / 50 exact shared care arrangement (it bugs me that qualifies me as a NCP in terms of iRD payment code!).

I bear no ill will regarding her decision to leave, I was surprised, but lucky that the marriage disintegration was effectively only 3 days from when her unfaithfulness was discovered. but while she was happy to leave the marriage she does not want to leave my wallet.

I’m in the situation of being assessed under the old system at the maximum and her at the minimum in terms of a 50 / 50 shared care arrangement. Most folk are surprised to learn that the iRD involve themselves in 50 / 50 situations and that any money changes hands at all.

I’ve long been on the mindset that each parent should contribute to the extra-ordinary costs such as Dental, School fees but are facing the conundrum of paying twice, an excessive amount of child support and then being asked for additional money otherwise there won’t be school trips / sports / tuition / braces.

I can’t see the kids going without.

I’ve offered to meet all of the costs but no IRD, but the ‘profit’ from the IRD formula is a powerful disincentive to obtaining any private arrangement.


How much did you pay on the old formula?


On the NEW formula what will that amount be per month?


Are you happy with the new formula?


What are your main reasons for being not happy with it?

Look, any reduction to a more realistic level is great.

But I have a very good estimate of what it costs to have the kids since I have the kids for exactly the same time as her.

It simply doesn’t cost effectively 33k per year for two children under the old system, or even the revised amount for this year.

I fear the issue of having to pay twice will continue. I would rather pay for things like school trips, dental directly, rather than it being extorted by her saying to the kids that she can’t afford it out of the 12k I will pay.

Has anything (outside of the new formula) changed that may have contributed to the change in amounts that you will recieve/pay?

None, salary is not even keeping pace with the sorts of cost of living adjustments given to beneficiaries!

I’m unclear whether there is a salary cap in the new system, it used to be that it was set at 2.5 x the median wage or something like that.

If child support was a set amount per child split between both parents for the basic necessities, what do you think is a fair amount per month per child?


What else would you like to say?

I’m lucky, I’ve got 50 / 50, get to participate in my kids lives, have been able to stay in the family home, provide them with memorable holidays etc, and still are able to afford to live.

That’s huge and I pause to reflect on the Generation of lost Fathers that this system perpetuates.

I have to say that dealings with the IRD are clearly gender-jaundiced, any consideration of fairness, equity etc seem to go out the window, they start from a position of dead beat dad who doesn’t want to provide for his kids and get worse from there.

Zane – Thanks for sharing with us.

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