Unfair When I Already Contribute 60% of Care and Pay for Most of the Extras – Case 140

Case 140

This is case study number 140

This is Belinda’s Story:

Belinda – Tell us about what is going on with your situation?

Separated 7 yrs ago and have been main caregiver and financial provider for three children over this time as the ex husband stopped paying c/s 2009 claiming he was made redundant.

He remarried and set up a limited company with his new wife 50% shareholder and director .

He is self employed builder. Has claimed since then his income is only 18-20,000 annually!

I had to refresh nursing qualifications and started off on the DPB and now have slowly increased my income.

Since 2013/2014 we have shared care in place with me 60% of care.

I am now in the position of being responsible for 100% of c/s and have to pay him!

How does this work? He is working continuously and lives in a household where the combined income would be much higher than my income alone.

I have paid for 90% of any extras required ie after school activities, hair cuts, school fees, etc etc.

He continually refuses to contribute. It feels to me I am being punished for getting back on my feet, being a responsible parent, being on the PAYE system and not being married.

Totally unfair.

Do the government not realise how much they have paid out to support my family in the earlier years when the father was perfectly capable of paying? What a joke.


How much did you pay on the old formula?


On the NEW formula what will that amount be per month?


Are you happy with the new formula?


What are your main reasons for being not happy with it?

Unfair when I already contribute 60% of care and pay for most of the extras that I now have to give him money because his is able to lie about his income level.

Makes me want to cry!

It gives me no incentive to earn more.

I know he will be laughing his head off about it. He does not need my money and it will be seen as a way of hurting me not as money to be used on the children.

If child support was a set amount per child split between both parents for the basic necessities, what do you think is a fair amount per month per child?


What else would you like to say?

Its incredibly unfair that one parent can just choose to opt out if he has a partner.

The best interests of the child are not taken into account by some parents.

I am dumbfounded that i now have to ‘fight’ with the IRD to prove my ex-husbands fraudulent behaviour and the affect it has on my financial circumstances.

All I want to do is get on with my life not waste it on filling out forms and gathering information.

Commonsense would tell you that I should not have to pay a cent out when I am more than contributing to the welfare of my children.

Belinda – Thanks for sharing with us.

We want to hear your story!

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